Welcome!

Saturday, January 24 -  Sabado

1:00 p.m. 

After greeting Rodrigo, I greet Christain and join the group of women who are on their way to Sueno Azul for a Womens Yoga and Art retreat.  It feels great to be back in this country, back home.  Christain is happy to see me and tells me all about his education in tourisim and how much he enjoys his job.  I marvel at the ease with which the Costa Ricans speak to me - about their lives, dreams, desires and realities.  I listen intently and thank God for these opportunities to interact with others in complete and total honesty.  

After Christain and Rodrigo load the luggage onto the Coaster (the vehicle used for the shuttle), we all board.  I take my usual seat up front, while Christain gives a little speech to the women.  As I realize he will not be joining us on the drive, I offer to provide additional information as we travel to Sueno Azul.  Christain picks right up and says “Oh, yes, and she speaks Spanish”.  I am shocked as well as flattered that my hotel Spanish is now passing for Spanish.  I smile in agreement.  Rodrigo and I communicate in our way and manage to convey our mutual joy and pleasure at seeing each other.    Throughout the journey, the women ask questions and I answer, feeling like I am already working - although I have just gotten off a plane as well.  I impart my Costa Rica knowledge - what town we are in, this is the National Park, this is the only tunnel in Costa Rica, etc. throughout the journey.  The women become increasingly dependent and when we stop for lunch they ask me to order for them before we disembark the vehicle.  I take a deep breath and explain that the menu will be in English - they’ll be fine.  

Post lunch, everyone is more relaxed and we board the Coaster for the remaining 30 minute ride to Sueno Azul.   

4:00 p.m. 

We arrive at Sueno Azul and I am the first one off the Coaster.  I head directly to Aura’s office.  Everyone happens to be around.  I am greeted by Aura, Dona Haydee, Don Federico, Adrian, Joaquin, Katalina all at once.  Hugs, kisses, greetings all in Spanish, with the exception of Aura and Adrian.  Everyone is thrilled and excited.  I am complimented repeatedly on my appearance.  “Charrito - you look so good” is the basis.  I say “Thank you”, all the while thinking ‘all I did was cut my hair and drop a few pounds’, but the compliment chorus continues and becomes specific, complete with hand gestures.  Remember, all of this is taking place in Spanish AND I UNDERSTAND!  “You are so skinny, your butt is higher, your skin is better, your hair looks great, you look much younger, you look 10 years younger.”  The final revealing comment comes from Dona Haydee “Where did you have your surgery?”.  My brain ceases to function as I realize that I have changed a lot - it’s not just my hair.  THEY think I’ve had plastic surgery!!!  To them, this is not uncommon and does not seem to carry the stigma that it does in the United States.  Dona Haydee has had several surgeries, although she refuses to admit it and simply says “I just don’t eat”.  We know that she has had surgeries not only from the fact that she spends months in Nicaragua and comes back looking dramatically different - but because the massage therapist has verified the surgery marks!  As my brain tries to process this information, reeling not only from the attention and the stigma but from the fact that I don’t think I look that different.  Afterall, it’s me - I live with myself everyday.  I remember feeling the change when I dropped the weight in August and seeing the change when I cut my hair in August and again right before I left for Costa Rica.  I certainly don’t see or feel a change that resembles plastic surgery, nor did I expect a greeting of this magnitude.  The compliments continue, I am padded, poked and caressed all while being complimented in Spanish.  

I regain my composure and manage to convey that I did not have surgery.  I tell them I drink a lot of water - that’s it.  As Aura gives me the final translation - just in case I missed anything - she explains that I look very different, much better and they are convinced I’ve had surgery.  She wants to know what I have done and how I look so different.  I explain that I changed what I eat, I cut my hair, I exercise everyday and I drink a lot of water.  I don’t tell her about the Kangen water, not yet.  Then we both look at each other and I say half as a statement, and half as a question “The massage therapist is going to check me for surgery marks.”  She looks at me, gives me the knowing smile and shakes her head ‘yes’.  I roll my eyes and smile.  I make arrangements to spend the next day at Aura’s house so we can catch up. 

As I am walking to my room, I am greeted by Juan Rameriz, he works in the garden and makes fresh flower arrangements for my room.  He is a very attractive flirt.  We have flirted with each other for years - harmless flirting.  Juan is totally taken by my appearance.  As a matter of fact, he doesn’t recognize me immediately, I have to speak before I am recognized.  He is impressed, thrilled and says I look much younger and much more attractive.  On the walk to my room, I am greeted by Sulay, the massage therapist, she also doesn’t recognize me until I speak.  She is shocked and tells me I look much younger - 10 years younger!  This is Sulay, who looks amazing!

This continues throughout the beginning of my visit.  Everyone I meet doesn’t recognize me immediately, they wait until I speak to call me by name and then they tell me I look much younger “mas hoven”.  Victor, the night guard, thinks I look 20 years younger.  Actually he teases me and says, “Donde Charrito?” Where is Charrito? as I am sitting right next to him. 

I spend the rest of the night in my room, unpacking, settling in.  Since I had the perfect lunch of cerviche (raw fish) and pantacones (tostones - fried green bananas) I don’t feel the need or have the desire to join the guests for dinner.   

Sunday, January 25 – Domingo

It has been raining all night and is still raining in the morning.  I want to spend the day at Aura’s, I had planned on walking, but I’m not sure how I am going to get there in this rain.  I spend the morning on the internet, in my office, eating breakfast, saying “Hola”, checking out the hotel.  Finally around 12:30 p.m., I call Aura and she offers to come and get me.  

Aura and I have developed a lasting friendship.  We travel together when I am in the country, go out to dinner, spend time at her house and we maintain contact via email and facebook throughout the year.    As we drive to her house she tells me how everyone is talking about how much younger I look.  She says they are convinced I’ve had surgery and Dona Haydee has instructed the massage therapist to look for the surgery marks.  She emphasizes that is what everyone is talking about.  Of course, she wants to know what I have done differently.  I explain about my diet and water and she doesn’t believe me.  I finally tell her about the Kangen water and how it changes the acid/alkaline balance of water and that it’s better for your system.  She’s unsure of this - but likes the explanation better than diet and exercise.  We spend the day catching up - just sitting in her house talking.  Joaquin comes home and says “I am so happy you are back in your home (meaning both Costa Rica and their house)”.  

Monday, January 26 – Lunes 

I am sick!  I was so chilled last night I slept fully dressed with socks and a scarf under two comforters in Costa Rica!!!  I am beginning to think I’ll have to move even further South just to be warm.  It rained all night, hard and loud!  Apparently I have contracted the Costa Rican illness ‘Gripa’ as a result of all the rain.  When it rains frequently for extended periods of time, it is accompanied by a chill (not one Northerners would feel) and an exponential increase in mold which can result in Gripa - a throat irritation that manifests with constant coughing and mild congestion.  The Gripa clears up with the weather.  However, if it continues to rain nightly, the Grips reoccurs with ease.  This is my first year contracting Gripa, I am officially a Costa Rican.  The Costa Ricans deal with this much better than I.  I feel awful!  I am rarely sick so I don’t deal well with being sick and I start to imagine a lifetime of impaired health - which doesn’t help with the healing process.  Gripa or no gripa I have a meeting with Don Federico and Adrian today.  

11:00 a.m. 

The meeting went well, as does setting up my office, ordering supplies planning and prepping for the opening.  Things are going so smoothly, I just wish I felt better.  I continued to be complimented on my appearance.  I just wish I felt as good as everyone seems to think I look!  I have requested a few food items.   So far they are only able to secure raw almonds.  I miss rice milk and Earl Grey Tea.  I also miss romaine lettuce, kale, spinach and dark leafy greens.  Luckily I brought rice protein powder and Greens + powder with me, so I can still make my daily protein shake.  

  

                                                                                                     Tuesday, January 27 - Martes                                                                                                                                                                          

11:00 a.m

I slept under two comforters again last night.   I am still sick and starting to wonder if I will ever feel better.  Rationally, logically I realize I will be healthy again - emotionally I feel I will always be sick.  Sickness consumes or depletes a massive amount of energy.  I spent the morning drinking water and getting ready for the day in a very slow and lazy pace. 

 

As I am making my protein shake, Perla, who has known me as long as I have been coming here - asks in front of Katalina, and a new member of the restaurant staff “Charrito, what have you been doing to look the way look.  Tell me exactly I want to know.”  The surprise of her statement shows in my face and I ask “Do I really look that different?”  “Yes - you look 10 years younger, healthier, you are thinner”.  I explain the change of diet, increase exercise and increase intake of water.  She says “no more bacon?  eggs?”  I laugh because I have actually forgotten what my eating habits were like.  I tell her I haven’t had bacon since the last time I was here.  She asks what I eat in the morning, I explain I drink a lot of water, follow that with raw almonds and fresh fruit.  Later if I am hungry I have a protein shake with Rice milk at home, with water here because we cannot find rice milk.  At home I eat a big salad with many different greens and for dinner usually vegetables.  They are still perplexed.  She asks again “So, no more fried eggs with bacon and cheese on bread?”  I say “I haven’t had that in months - but it does sound good.  Perhaps a little once in a while - but not as often as before.”.  Afterwards Katalina and Perla approach me and tell me that if I want something special to eat - just tell them and they will make it for me.  

2:00 p.m. 

After a significant amount of rain, it is finally sunny.   I am starting to feel a little better.  I’ve made arrangements for a massage at 5:00 p.m. - hoping to get the rest of this illness out of my system.  I am so tired and long to be in the sun.  I take my work with me down to the pool and promptly fall asleep fully dressed in one of the lounge chairs.  

6:30 p.m. 

The massage was fabulous.  True to form I was checked throughly for any evidence of surgery.  Regardless of laying on my front or back - there were points when the towel was not covering any part of my body.  I hope they don’t mistake the closing navel piercing as a surgery scar. 

Wednesday, January 28 – Miercoles

11:00 a.m. 

I awoke feeling a little better today.  I was able to sleep with just one comforter.  But the illness is still draining my energy.  After making my protein shake, Matt and Evelyn from the Trapeze stop me.  They want to know what I am drinking.  Matt launches into how much better I look and wants to know what have I done.  I explain the input/output changes and as I am starting to wonder how bad I looked last year that everyone feels compelled to comment on it this year, he says “Not that you looked bad last year.  It’s just that you look healthier, younger, more fit.”.  I thank him for the clarification.  He invites to swing on the trapeze with them when they practice.  I am appreciative for the offer - but don’t think I’ll be flying on the trapeze this year.  

Later, back in my room I stare at myself in the mirror.  Today might not be the best day to look for changes, to see what everyone else sees.  I’m tired, it’s raining again and I’m still perplexed by this out pour of appreciation  for my new look.  A look I thought consisted of a haircut and a few pounds lost - one I didn’t even imagine anyone would notice with the exception of the hair.  All of these comments in a short period of time make me wonder anew how any of us are able to fully see ourselves at all.  This is the premise of one of the first workshops I taught at Omega entitled “Yoga from the Inside/Out”.  It speaks to how we are not in our bodies and how it is a miracle we are able to see ourselves at all given the distortion in the mirror, the effect the environment and our mood have on our perception.  Funny that I stand here looking in the distorted glass through my clouded vision for changes....changes that I just can’t see, at least not today.    

Aura explained to me in a brief moment - that I do look different.  According to her, my skin is not as dark with spots.  I was beginning to look old with soft facial skin and it was sagging - that is all gone, the skin is firm and smooth with a nice texture - my waist is my narrow and I am more trim.  The specifics amaze me as well as provide the foundation for something to think about and look for in the mirror - perhaps overtime I will understand.  

Thursday, January 29 – Jueves 

6:30 a.m. 

I awake to the sound of holler monkeys after a night of hard driving rain.  Sometimes it rains so hard I wake in the middle of the night in a slight panic, irrationally wondering if the roof will hold.    It’s impossible to describe the amount of rain and the accompanying sound.  Finally I feel better, closer to my old self.  I start my morning in the usual way, plenty of water.  Then, strap on the sneakers and head out the door for a nice long walk.   Since it’s my first morning out this trip I decide to stick to the road that leads to Sueno Azul.  I am surrounded by greenery, flowers and the occasional horse.  The air is clean and clear and I am reminded of one of the many reasons I love Costa Rica.  I follow the walk with stretching on the foot bridge over the rushing river and stop in the restaurant for a plate of fresh fruit before heading up to my room for a little yoga on the terrace.   I spend the rest of the morning relaxing on the terrace with water, tea and fresh fruit.  I am like a child, filled with delight over my surroundings, the peace of the day and my health.   

9:00 a.m. 

I decide to take advantage of the peacefulness and stretch out on the bed for a little bit before starting my work day.  Don Federico has other plans for me.  As soon as I lay down on the bed, Mareanella from the Lavendaria knocks on my door, wishes me a good morning and tells me that Federico would like to see me.  So much for relaxing, I get in the shower and prepare to start my day. 

5:00 p.m. 

I leave the hotel with Aura and Joaquin for dinner at San Che Cha’s.  I cannot bear the thought of attending the Rodeo (tonight’s event) so early in the season and decide it is better to venture in to town to see my friend San Che Cha and have some real Costa Rican food. 

It feels great to be back and San Che Cha’s, my favorite Costa Rican restaurant - not so much for the food as for the way I am treated.  I greet Dona Nice - she is pleased to see me.  Aura and I sit at the counter and order ceviche (raw fish marinated in lemon juice with cilantro) and pantacones (you should know what these are by now). papaya con leche for Aura, guanabana con agua for me .  We are testing the cerviche before we order more.  Joaquin, who is playing some kind of video game, will eat this order.  Aura’s and my palate are a little more discerning - we prefer ceviche that is made early on the same day - not freshly made cerviche or cerviche from the day before.  I am excited to see San Che Cha.  We ask for him, but he is taking a nap.  

The food is delivered - the ceviche doesn’t pass Aura’s taste test.  She makes a face so vile I rush to hand her a napkin.  The pantacones and natural drinks are divine.  We sit and talk while I look around and appreciate that I am once again in this country.  San Che Cha makes an appearance and he doesn’t recognize me.  This is getting confusing as well as old.  I have spent a few minutes in front of the mirror several times a day trying to see what they see.  I don’t see it and I don’t understand it.  I desperately want to be recognized before I speak, like always.  I smile, he still is uncertain - he looks at Aura, he looks at me - it is obvious that he is not comprehending.  I remain smiling, although my heart is a sad, and finally say in my poorly accented Spanish “San Che Cha!”.  He looks still not comprehending and Aura says in Spanish - “it’s Charrito”.  I finally speak again and the recognition is there although the confusion on his face has not left.  He hugs me, and begins to study me - comments about my appearance - thin, so pretty,  different, very beautiful.  The awkwardness of the moment passes and things are just like they always were.  We talk and laugh and catch up.  We order more food, although I am not that hungry and have difficulty deciding what to get.  Joaquin joins us after winning the equivalent of $ 10.00 on the video game.  It rains off and on very hard.  When the rain is heavy, the sound of it hitting the metal roof drowns out all other sounds - conversation, television, traffic - cease to exisit audibly but remain visually.  I sit back, smile and take in the experience of being surrounded by friends, content, well fed, dry under the protection of the roof as I observe the slowing of traffic, television without sound and Costa Ricans continuing about their business as nature makes it’s music naturally. 

7:30 p.m.

Aura and Joaquin drive me to Perla’s father’s house (the local taxi driver) so he can take me back to Sueno  Azul They call ahead and let him know that I need a ride back.  I know Perla’s father, he has driven me back to the hotel several times each season.  He has given me updates on Perla when she was pregnant and we have had some interesting, language challenged conversations.  He doesn’t recognize me either!  I get in the car, we drive a little bit and he asks me my name.  Once again I am really crushed and offended.  I do not reveal this - after all there is a language barrier.  I say “Charrito” and wait.  It registers and he is shocked.  “Oh, Charrito” -  we converse awkwardly due to the language difficulties.  As we near the hotel he asks me again (he has asked me this every year except last year) if I have a husband.  I answer, ‘No, no husband’, and save him the rest of the questions, “No children and no boyfriend”.  This time he cannot contain himself.  He explains (suddenly his English is much better) that he is married and proceeds to launch into “you are a beautiful woman, you are nice, you are sweet, you are smart, I do not understand why you do not have a boyfriend/husband.  What is wrong?”  I thank him and launch into a Spanish/English answer about traveling, not staying in one place for very long and that it is difficult to meet a man when I am always traveling.  He doesn’t like the answer and says “Perhaps this time in Costa Rica you will find one”.  

Friday, January 30 – Viernes

7:00 a.m. 

I decide to incorporate a grounds inspection into my morning walk.  Federico has built tennis courts and I need to see them before I give orientation on Sunday.  I would also like to walk the hills and since it has been raining all night it is actually cool this morning which is a great time to walk the hills in the sunshine.   I head out on the dirt and rock road that is used to run horses and trucks behind the main property.  As I get to the last room before heading up the hill there is a rogue horse to my left.  I am turning right.  I stop and look at him.  He looks at me.  I turn right and he starts to follow.  I pray that he will head back towards the rooms because I don’t feel like being alone on this hill with a rogue horse.  He turns the other direction and I am grateful.  I check out the tennis courts - they are coming along nicely and return to the path.  As I head down hill enjoying the peace of the morning and the challenge of remaining upright on this rocky road, I hear the gallop of multiple horses behind me.  I turn to look and there are 25 horses running at full speed in my direction.  No one is leading them.  I know from experience that someone is driving them from behind and cannot see me.  I am on the downward side of  the rock and gravel path hill, it is surrounded by tall, lush greenery on either side.  No one can see me and the horses are coming quickly.  I start to run and quickly realize I am not going to be able to out run these horses on this path!  I actually laugh to myself, stand still in the middle of the road and realize I have to do something they are getting closer and they are not slowing down.  I take a deep breath - stop laughing, check for snakes and other animals and jump into the greenery on the side of the road.  As I look up the horses are 6 feet away and running directly at me - I’ve picked the lower side of the greenery and they like to run on it when possible because I guess it feels better on their hooves than getting rocks stuck in their shoes.  There is no time to change sides.  I’m not sure what to do so I start waving my arms - kind of like you would if you were stranded on an island and needed to  flag down a plane.  It works and the horses veer to the other side.  They are really moving.  I am feeling a little ridiculous waving my arms - so I stop.  The horses start running at me again.  I move further into the greenery and they are merely brushing past me.  I’m not sure if I’m breathing.  I think I am holding my breath.  I’m not really scared, perhaps I’m shocked, perhaps I’ve just surrendered to my experience of Costa Rica and know that if I do my best - I’ll be taken care of, or perhaps it’s just too damn surreal to even register in my head.  After all it was peaceful when I started out - no one was around except that rogue horse.  As the person who is driving them comes by - he looks at me and I say “No le guista” (I don’t like).  He says (in English) “I 2:00 p.m. 

I am scheduled to go rafting today.  Due to the recent earthquake, we are no longer able to raft the Sarapiqui River.  The river is unsuitable, or as they say here unusable, for rafting for a least a year.  I am told it is the color of coffee with milk, there are dead, rotting trees along the banks and debris continue to float in it’s waters.  We have changed rafting companies as well as rivers and as the Omega representative, I must take the rafting tour to ensure it is suitable for our guests.  I requested the inspection during the meeting with Adrian and Federico on Monday.  Johan - one of the new members of the Reception staff, has made the necessary arrangements and invited a good percentage of the staff.  We are scheduled to raft the Chirribo River with Sarapiqui Outdoor Center.  This is a different company and river than the one I was given in the meeting.  

I meet with David Duarte Soto, the owner of Sarapiqui Outdoor Center.  He provides the necessary insurance and operation certificate and explains the details of the tour and the river.  He seems nice enough, but becomes defensive when questioned. . I realize that I am partial to Adventuras de Sarapiqui, the former rafting company, and am having difficulty accepting that we can no longer raft the same river we have been rafting for years.  So I make a mental note of David’s behavior, but don’t give it to much attention.  I am also still feeling a little sick and know that spending any time in the river always makes me feel worse - so I am not looking forward to this inspection, despite the fact that it promises to be a more exciting experience.  River rafting ranges from a Class 1 (clam waters) to a Class 5 (rough and raging water).  The Sarapiqui was a Class 1, 2.  The Chirribo is rated a Class 3.

Before we leave, Adrians asks me to correct the grammar and spelling of the post rafting evaluation form David has developed as well as the release form.  The release form has so many mistakes and is written in pseudo legal jargon that it takes a little while to correct.  I’m also beginning to wonder if Sarapiqui Outdoor Center is a professional operation.  At my request, Aura and Diego are accompanying me on this tour.  At Johan’s invitation so are Matthew, Evelyn, Nobo, Arturo from the Trapeze; Luz from Reception; Ricki, an American Chiropractor that seems to be hiding out here; and a guest from this week.  Sherry, who no longer works at the hotel, drives us to the “put in”, located near Roberto’s Restaurant.  This is a very different set up than what I am accustomed to.  The point where we will enter the river is in a yard that is used for trucks.  It has been raining a lot - there are deep muddy tire tracks and the Chirribo is fed by Rio Susio (Dirty River), which is a river full of minerals.  The Chirribo looks a lot like Rio Susio today.  So much so that I get the two of them confused.  As everyone else disembarks the vehicle, I am hit with this overwhelming feeling that I cannot go on this tour.  The sense of knowing is so strong I am momentarily paralyzed - face is frozen and breathing halted.  I can feel deep in my solar plexus’ that I should not go on this tour today.  I am momentarily torn between my position as the Omega representative and my personal safety.  I am here to do a job and feel the weight of my responsibilities, however I have worked long and hard at honing my instincts and they are all screaming at me not to go.  I make the only decision that seems right for me - I decide not to go.   I know that it is fine for the other’s to go - but it’s not right for me.  Sherry agree’s to take me to Roberto’s while I wait for someone from Sueno Azul to pick me up.  Aura and Diego do not question my decision, all of the North Americans protest. Saturday, January 31 – Sabado

9:00 a.m. 

I have given up walking and practicing yoga before going to work.  Since I walk a lot during the day, I have modified my morning exercise to yoga on my terrace.  I’m still not 100% better, my morning practice helps to center the day and to relax my upper body.  Thanks to Kangen water system and the newly purchased hot pot - I can spend the early morning hours in my room, drinking water, practicing yoga followed by more water, almonds and tea.  After a shower, I head off to the dinning room for fresh fruit and I’m ready to start my day.  

Today is arrival day for the first Omega guests.  I have a busy day ahead setting up the classroom, organizing the information table and making sure everything is in place for our first guests.  Due to the nature of the economy our total numbers are down 65% from usual.  Registrations are still coming in, but the numbers are so low Omega is offering specials.  $100 off for you and 50% discount if you bring a friend.  The price of flights are also at an all time low - so it’s an excellent deal.  Despite the promotion, the first week of workshops has been reduced to one workshop with 12 participants and 7 R&R guests.  Our first week is usually 45 guests in three different workshops.   

8:00 p.m. 

At their request, I join Don Federico and Dona Haydee for dinner. The arrival has gone smoothly and everyone is happy.  As I sit down, Haydee asks Federico to tell me the following “I know I have told you this several times already, but I want to tell you again because I want to make sure you understand.  You look very beautiful, relaxed, at peace, you have a wonderful energy, a glow, a light that comes from deep inside, you are content.  You seem in balance.”   I am grateful and thank her.  They are so proud of me, like parents.  Federico wants me tell him exactly what I have done - so he can do the same!  We laugh.  They want to know what I have done since I left in April and why I came back so late.  Why didn’t I come sooner - what was I doing that I couldn’t come sooner.

We talk about the changes in the hotel, there have been many as there are every year.  Most notably the hotel is more organized and the staff seem at peace.  Federico and Haydee are considering taking the workshop with Robert Moss this week.  Since it is about writing, I think I will take it too.